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It’s been confirmed and it appears the rumors are true. - Papa Smurf has joined the Blue Man Group. It appears they will be residing in a modest 800 square foot mushroom in smurf village while they come up with ideas for their next tour. He has been forced to abdicate his role as leader of the smurfs due to a conflict of interest relating to the fact that the Blue Man Group makes money off of their performances in violation of the smurf code of ethics.

There is speculation that joining the group is an effort to appear younger and hippier to Smurfette, as he is several hundred years her senior. He has expressed a willingness to “make an honest smurf of her”. Apparently, Smurfette has always been an avid fan of the Blue Man Group. Ironically, the Blue Man Group have always been avid fans of Papa Smurf.

When asked for comment the Blue Man Group played a very energetic tune on PVC pipes. It was obvious they were having troubling articulating their feelings on the matter.

Some feel this move comes as a ploy to offset the Blue Man Group’s sagging ratings and connect with generations of Smurf fans old and young alike. What instrament Papa Smurf will be playing is yet to be determined.

“These inky and blinky characters may be the central figures today, but this history goes all the way back to Wiley Coyote and the Tazmanian Devil. That Taz is funny though, that fella still cracks me up. To those who love cartoons, you’re either for the terrorists or your against them. ”

This was Bush’s response earlier today, in reference to growing concern over terrorist cartoon characters. Bush has laid out a plan to stop cartoon threats and money laundering operations like the cartoon network existing as fronts for terrorist organizations. Bush said the current administration is also looking into the possibilities that the cartoons may be harboring weapons of mass destruction.

“This will be a swift and clean operation. Based on our findings we will hold, torture and kill a number of animators responsible for creating these cartoons. No frame will go unexamined. Not since Roger Rabbit have cartoons had such a reason to fear for their existence.”

The President was later informed that Roger Rabbit was in fact fictional, a matter he is taking under advisement. An inside leak close to the President has hinted that the President himself has a substantial stash of cowboy anime porn, and if this is true it could deliver a blow to the current anti-cartoon efforts.

The NSA has also begun pulling records on everyone who has bought a litebrite in the last 20 years to be put on a special watch list.